Shiro moved to another world....3

I like this photo very much.

Shiro taught me that it is good to have warm and loving smiles on faces to light up people's hearts.


His smile was gifted.



(Shiro and Mana that is his sister, Mahina)

My father loves Mana, so he wanted to keep her at home.

However, when I tried to take Shiro and Mana to the beach by a track, I lost her on the highway.....

I tied them with leashes in back of the track (which was outside not inside).

When I realized that she was gone, Shiro and I walked along the highway to find her.
We could not find her....

I regreted myself that why I did this....

I hope she was saved by a good family....



Dear Mana:

I am sorry that I lost Shiro, too.

I hope he is with you....

Shiro moved to another world....2

Shiro always gave me big smiles!

He likes to be taken photos? He really has a nice smile that makes people, especially me, happy.

When he was a little boy like this photo, I put him dresses.
Shiro and my father were having boy's talk??

When I was tired or upset, his smiles made my heart warm.

He seemed to be tired for playing a lot. (This photo was also taken when he was a little boy.)

Shiro.....Mahalo nui loa for coming to our house.

I have many memories with him.

If I think of his past life with us, it made me cry.

I always felt sorry to him because I could not help him much.

I did not have energy, power and money to give him more happiness.

He was usually tied with a short leash. The time when he could run freely was when we took him walk at a park.

I believe that he had sad, scary, tired and angry days. However, he was always smiling at me when we saw each other.

For 4 months, I have been out of my father's house.

I came to visit them as much as I could make my time.

I could not take him walk every day.

Shiro......I really love him.

Whenever and wherever I remember of him, he is always smiling in my heart.

Mahalo Shiro......

I hope he is peaceful....

Shiro moved to another world....1

These photos were taken when Shiro was less than 3 months old.

Smelling something good, Shiro??

Sleeping on the girl's arms....ZZZZZZZ

My father and I were at Hawaii Community College to try to sell five puppies (his brothers and sister).

Shiro was one of them.

We could not sell him. He was meant to be with us!

Shiro is talking with an owl that my brother gave for my father?

Walking happily in our yard.....

Why was it happen to Shiro....?

Shiro passed away on 5/3, 2010.

He was 1 year old when a car hit him.....

He died on the road in front of our house.

Busy moment.....

I have been so so so busy. I believe that I made my life busy for weeks.

After the lady I used to take care passed away, I got much free time.

Sometimes, I walk along the Hilo bay.

It was at sunset. A big wide sky was turning to pink. Finally, we see a clear sky.
Hilo has been raining for weeks. The day was a good gift for us like me who have been starving of a clear sky.


Mauna Kea showed up. We have not seen the tall mountain for weeks. The summit is usually behind the clouds.

When Mauna Kea appears, it reminds us its size and power.

In Waimea (about 1 hour drive from Hilo) has a delicious bakery. The bread is baked in a big oven.

The inside of the bread is very soft but chewy, and the scorched outside is hard but tasty. I bought one that has nuts and a dried fruit in. It made me feel like heaven. I ate a big roll a day!

Hilo has a dolphin rescure center!!! It is a rehabilitation for injured dolphins.
We have only 1 pool now so far, so we can help only a dolphin.

We have four times training classes to be a volunteer. It is funded by NOAA and supported by volunteers.

I am keeping myself busy. I do not know but feel that there are many things I can do.

I still live in the bayshore towers.

I am now staying at a studio room by myself. She has more than one apartments at the tower.

I am very appreciate what I have for my housing.

The lady I was taking care of as a rainbow

We had a funny day on 3/9, 2010.

The weather in Hilo has been dynamic.
The weather was changing a lot.


One day, I want to try kayak surfing and padding-boad surfing.




I have to enjoy Hilo's life as much as possible.

It is too bad that I am taking pictures. I wish I would be one of the people who ride on the kayak. Maybe next time!





When the lady who I was taking care of at night passed away, one of her friends saw rainbow.

She is my rainbow after I heard the story.

She came to visit us!

Rainbow started to be seen by me that it becomes a symbol of the lady.

Rainbow becomes special in my mind.

Aloha to her....

Memorial Gathering on 3/8, 2010

Goodbye to the shell of the lady who I was taking care of ....

She is going to leave Hilo for L.A. for her another funeral.

Tonight, we went to hilo's funeral home to see her.

Her face was the most peaceful face I have ever seen.

After the funeral home, we went to a restaurant for dinner.

She wants us to enjoy but not to be sad or crying.

One of her sons lets me stay her house till April.

I will find a new place to stay and start a new life.

I am going to miss this beautiful view.....

I love her house.

When I saw her shell tonight, I realized that she was not in her shell anymore.

Her spirit goes above.

When she passed away, she was in her shell, I thought.

It is not goodbye to her just to her shell.

Mahalo for having me.

She gave me lifetime gifts.

The lady who I was taking care of .....

The lady who I was taking care of at night passed away on March 4th around 4pm in the Hawaiian time.

I cried so hard that I thought I would not be able to function by myself.

When I arrived her place, she was cold but looked like that she was sleeping.

Her face was very peaceful.


Life is unexpected.

After she died, time moves countinously. However, my time could not keep up to the time. My time moves slowly.

I was going to talk with her, feed her, and take care of her all night.

A big change gave me deep regret of what I could not do for her, extreme sadness that I won't talk with and see her (figure), and confusion of what happened.

I could not stop crying. My time stopped. I could not eat.

My tears expressed my feeling, and at the same time, my whole body expressed my deep sadness.

I am sure that she will angrily say "Stop crying. Eat."

I have to be strong. She was strong. She had a strong spirit.

She gave me many colors in my life.

The color of my minds, body, and spirits were changing without a stable color.

I was with her only 104 days.

What color(s) did I give her?

(the lady with one of her caregivers)

She gave and left me many lessons and gifts.

I am very happy to know her, her caregivers (they are all nice!), her friends, her family and relatives.

They have supported me a lot. My friends also really support me.

Thanks to all!

Sometimes, I felt that I hated her; however, I really love her.

I still could not believe what happened and accept her death.

She is still inside of me with raw memories. It is hard to digest the memories of my 104 days at the bayshore tower.

I keep cleaning and organizing her things to hope that she will visit here.

I hope I can see her once a more to move on my life.